Katie

On the One Hand: A Back to School Reflection

I am a walking contradiction. Depending upon which minute of the day you talk to me, you might hear a different version of this story.

On one hand, I feel relief. Joy. Release. Freedom. I am not the one in charge of two kid’s education. I don’t have to be the one to manage everything all the time. I am not juggling reading lessons with math lessons with diaper changes with meal prep, cleaning the sinks, and getting the laundry into the dyer before it starts to smell. I am not the one convincing someone to write three sentences instead of one or to read a book they didn’t pick. There’s quiet when the toddler naps. I can take a breath.

On the other hand, I am not the one in charge of two kid’s education. I don’t get to create an atmosphere of learning and joy around the table every day. I am not choosing curriculum, ordering books or supplies, nor am I witnessing with delight the incremental progress as they grow in their understanding of this world we live in. I am not planning field trips that ignite our imaginations or stretch our ideas of how God might use us in this life.

We won’t have Friday adventure days (though we can have them on the weekends!) and won’t start our days around the table with steaming mugs of hot chocolate. Instead, you will gain other adults who want to see you grow, spend three days a week in the garden, and get to go to music class twice a week and art class. You’ll learn skills I don’t know to teach you, practice being independent in a safe space, and have opportunities to make friends you will see every day.

I take my toddler on a walk. Even at 10 a.m., it’s so hot we are dripping in no time. We prep dinner, eat too many snacks in too short a time, pull out a puzzle that never gets done, keep her out of the big kid’s room, reassure her that they will come home soon, give her a middle-of-the-day bath, and put her down for a nap. It’s quiet now. And I love it, and I hate it.

But I mostly love it. And then I wonder if I should love it a little bit less.

God, I heard you those many months ago when you asked me to open my hands and trust you with my big kids. It was your voice that put all of this into motion. I’m reminded that obedience doesn’t always make sense but produces a harvest of righteousness. I can’t quite see what you are doing in my life right now. I’m still home with a toddler, but it does feel as though a new season might be just around the corner. Breathe your Holy Spirit into our days.

May we delight in learning more about ourselves, you, and the world you created, whether we are gathered around our kitchen table or at a school desk.

Saying “No” Paves the Way for a Fulfilling “Yes

The author discusses the importance of saying ‘no’, emphasizing that every ‘yes’ inevitably entails a trade-off, meaning a ‘no’ to something else. They underscore the need for intentional decision-making and recognizing the full cost of commitments. As a useful New Year’s resolution, they propose figuring out what matters most and articulating these trade-offs, to prioritize more fulfilling ‘yeses’.

It’s easy to say, ‘yes’.

The words just roll off your tongue and land in the air between you and the person who is asking something of you.

Yes, I can help. Yes, I can jump onto the call. Yes, I can bake those cookies. Yes, I can join that team. Yes, I can do that after school pick-up. Yes, I can squeeze that into my day.

It makes us feel good (and important and accomplished) and it makes the person asking something of us feel happy. Which makes us feel even better.

It’s hard to say ‘no’. It feels risky.

You risk missing out, you risk disappointing someone, but most of all you risk missing out on how you should actually be spending your time.

For many years, I didn’t realize that every ‘yes’ had a trade-off.

Instead, I wondered why I felt so busy. I couldn’t figure out why my hours at work and at home never seemed to be enough. What I didn’t realize was that every ‘yes’, meant a ‘no’ to something else. And vice versa. That every ‘no’ (even when it feels hard!), can actually allow for a more meaningful, fulfilling, and intentional “yes”.

Once I made this connection, it was transformative.

When I served as a pastor and ministry lead, I often reminded my supervisor (which I am not sure he loved!) that every ‘yes’ I said, actually meant a ‘no’ to someone else. Or a lesser, diminished ‘yes’ to another project. There are trade-offs to every ‘yes’.

Sure, I can attend that brainstorming meeting. But it means that I won’t be able to meet a congregant for coffee. Yes, I can be in charge of baptisms and run the classes. But, it means that redeveloping the Small Group’s website will take longer. Of course, I can write that devotional. But, it means that I have one less hour for my own team development.

Sometimes, we aren’t sure what the exact trade-offs are. But, if you can articulate the trade-off, you can start making better decisions, take better risks, and prioritize your days for more fulfilling ‘yeses’.

As we stand a the starting line of a new year (hello, 2024!), don’t let my mistakes be yours.

This year, instead of creating new goals or resolutions that will fall by the wayside soon, what if we look at what we can say ‘no’ to so that we can say our better ‘yes’?

Of course, it’s easier said than done.

Here are some resources to help you along in figuring out where to spend your time, what to say ‘yes’ to in 2024, and what to start saying ‘no’ to.

Figure out what matters most. Kendra Adachi at the Lazy Genius Collective is a pro at this. Listen to her talk about how to name what matters here.
Articulate the tradeoffs. Look at your calendar and your running to-do list. What is on your list that you never get to do? What do you wish was on your to-do list? What do your current ‘yeses ‘keep you from doing? What can you add to your Don’t List? Challenge yourself to choose at least one thing to not do in the New Year.
Learn more about your best yes! I am not the first person to talk about this idea. Lysa TerKeurst wrote a whole book on the topic. Check it out here.
Let me help you. If you feel stuck, or don’t know how to articulate the trade-offs, I would love to help you. Shoot me an email here and we will schedule a call.

Hazmat suits and miracles.

I knew we were sick, I just didn’t know how sick.

I’m not sure knowing would have changed anything though. We had been told to avoid any official personnel. Government people, police, and medical officials were definitely to be avoided. That was proving difficult as I opened my hotel door, to a hallway full of hazmat-wearing officials. They knew my name. They knew I was sick. And they wanted to take us to an undisclosed location to quarantine.

I argued at first. “In America, 100 degrees is not qualified as a fever”.

I played dumb. “I am not sure where my traveling companions are…it’s just me”.

I bargained. “I will come downstairs with you if I may use a phone to call the United States”.

And finally, when it seemed as though there were no other options, I agreed to get in the back of their ambulance and go with them.

It turns out, the CDC in this particular country is first-rate. The day before a passenger sitting a row ahead of us on our flight from the US checked himself into the hospital. He tested positive for H1N1 – or swine flu. And the CDC kicked into action. They detained and quarantined anyone sitting within a couple of rows of patient zero. Because we were the first of our group to return to a registered hotel and check in using our passports, we were the first to be picked up.

After a quick call to my contact in the United States, “Hello…I am being picked up by some government officials. No, they cannot tell me where we are going. Yes, I will try to call you with more information. Can you please let the other parents know? And maybe call the embassy?”, I go back to the other three students in my group and let them know what is happening. Until now, I have kept the CDC officials busy only talking with me and have asked them not to interrupt the sleep of my “colleagues”.

We knew we were sick, but we didn’t want to say it out loud. Really, I thought we had altitude sickness mixed with some dehydration. I thought our bodies were still adjusting to the 8,000-foot elevation. We weren’t one hundred percent why we were being picked up – after all, this country wasn’t known for its hospitality to Christians. We deposited all evidence of the local missionaries into the bathroom toilets and deleted records from our phones. We buried the two bibles deep into our bags – this wasn’t part of the plan and we weren’t sure what to do with them.

We rode down in the elevators and I threw up right before the doors opened. “Just leave it,” I said as we walked out. “I don’t want them to know that I know that I’m sick”. The hazmat suits swarmed around us; we put on surgical gowns, hospital booties, masks, and hair nets. They ushered us into the waiting ambulance with its flashing lights eerily lighting up the whole street. I asked again where we were going, but at this time, the translator was no longer with us and no one could understand my question.

We arrived in the dark at a building with a row of doctors and nurses outside waiting for us. This is still one of the most confusing parts of my memory. I am sure it must not have been as dramatic as I remember, but it was dark and I was scared and apparently I had swine flu. I remember being rushed inside a harshly lit building with someone yelling, BOYS ON ONE SIDE AND GIRLS OVER HERE. I tried to say, “They told me we would be kept together”. But no one was listening.

In the end, it turned out alright. The boys were simply on one side of the building and the girls were on the other side. In between the two corridors was a hallway meant for official personnel only. There was a red line that meant we were not to cross the threshold. We were each given a room with a bed and a bathroom. There was a sliding window in our rooms where they could serve our food without being exposed to us.

As chaotic as that memory feels, I am sure it was quite orderly and calm in comparison to what it could have been. I didn’t know it yet, but in the days to come, I would thank God for bringing us to such a facility with access to much-needed medical care for much of our group.

Of the eleven of us, nine would test positive for H1N1. One would need extensive care for complications related to H1N1 and dysentery. It certainly wasn’t the trip we had planned for. In fact, all the things we had discussed not doing seemed to be happening. But, somehow, in the midst of all this, we were able to share God’s hope with the very people we were supposed to be avoiding. Over the course of the eleven days we were quarantined, doctors and nurses would ask us questions: “Why did you come here, really? Why do you seem so happy even when you are so sick?”

I wonder sometimes if they ever think about that time when eleven Christians from America were quarantined on their watch? If it impacted them in the same way it affected us? Was it just another day at work? Or did God plant something deep in their hearts during those days? I don’t know if we will ever know on this side of heaven. But, we do know that God was with us. He was actually protecting us. And he brought us home safely – which still feels rather miraculous.

______ is not the Promised Land.

I put a lot of faith in the promised land. The Promised Land, in my mind’s eye, is where everything will fall into place. Once I get married, once I have kids, once I get that job, once we find the house, once we move to a certain city, once we get where we are supposed to be going, or achieve a type of lifestyle. It’s almost as though, my heart believes that the Promised Land is very close, just around the corner. But it seems elusive. This land, flowing with milk and honey remains just out of reach. I tell myself, that if I can just figure out the next right step, if I can just get the last puzzle piece in place, then I will have arrived.

But, what if the thing, whatever your fill-in-the-blank is, isn’t actually the Promised Land?

What if God stands in amazement at the way in which I get stuck in circular thinking and the spinning of wheels?

What if the journey is just as important as the destination?

What if God can meet me in the wandering in an even more real way than I ever imagined?

What if part of it is about being faithful in the before. Faithful in the wandering and the wondering?

What if the thing I am looking for doesn’t bring the salvation that I expect?

What if the very thing I am looking for, I have already found in the person of Jesus Christ?

The Bible starts in a garden and ends in a garden. And in between God’s people are promised a land in which God will be present to them and they will be present to God and they will flourish and bless all the other nations. The Bible Project describes the Promised Land as, “a picture of covenant faithfulness as God’s people try (and often fail) to live out their divine calling”. The thing is, God is always faithful to hold up his end of the bargain. It’s his people, it’s us, that forget and wander off and whether willfully or not, end up hopelessly unfaithful. It’s in Jesus, that we find the One who can keep the covenant for humanity and it’s Jesus who through his death and resurrection ushers us into the kingdom of God – the already and not yet kingdom.

And so, I preach to myself, that _________ is not the Promised Land. I already have access to the Promised Land, to the thing that will most lead to flourishing and to the kingdom of God in the here and now. I already get to participate in the unfolding of what God is doing in the restoring and redeeming of all things – right where I am. No next step needed.

_________ is not the Promised Land, but Jesus is with me.
He is Emmanuel, God with me. And his Holy Spirit, the Promised One is with me and for me.

Is there something you find yourself placing your hope in today? Something that feels very much like the Promised Land? As though perhaps you can just figure it out and get that last puzzle piece to fall into place, you might have made it? Maybe if you squint hard enough you can just see it in the distance?

Can you join me in simply saying, ________ is not the Promised Land; But I know the One who promises he will never leave me, will never forsake me. I put my trust and hope in Him. I re-center myself today on his promises and goodness. I ask Him who is faithful to help me to be faithful in the waiting.

You’re Moving Where? For How Long?

– A Short-term International Move with Two Young Kids

These were the two questions uttered most often when we shared the news of our short-term move to Australia. Many laughed and then stopped when they realized we weren’t joking.

I get it. It does almost seem laughable – it’s a long, long way. And it’s not exactly an easy move, there are lots of logistics and it’s a ton of work for a relatively short time. However, as I found, the internet is full of ex-pats who want to help you with your own move. And it’s not as odd as it sounds…others have done it. If they did it, you can too!

Here are the top tips we learned in preparing and actually making the leap.

1 – Decide what you are bringing and what you are leaving

There are a lot of different things to weigh as you decide how much to bring and whether you will ship any of your belongings. This is a great time to experiment with being a minimalist! You can always pick up whatever you didn’t end up bringing – you just might pay a little more for it.

Here are some of our thought processes:

We were only planning on a 1-2 year stint in Australia.
Due to Covid, it was taking 3-5 months for shipping companies to ship a container on an ocean liner. And it was excessively expensive to ship via Air Freight. It would have cost more than our items were worth.
Because this was only a short-term relocation, we didn’t want to move ALL our things (sentimental, winter clothes, kitchen appliances, furniture). We rented a storage unit in the States (make sure it’s climate controlled) to store items.
Bed measurements are slightly different in Australia, so unless you are bringing mattresses, don’t pack your linens.
The voltage is different, so unless you are also packing voltage converters, don’t bother bringing your appliances.

2 – Decide How You Will Pack

We opted to pack in suitcases and duffle bags and check our luggage via airplane. This way, we always had everything we needed and it was ultimately the cheapest way to travel.
Check your airline requirements. This might be a good thing to do as you compare prices. I just assumed that international travel meant two FREE checked bags with every ticket. However, Delta only allowed us one each and the other bags could be checked for a $100 fee. However, it’s still less expensive than shipping them with a company.
You could also look into Send My Bag courier services. We didn’t know where we were going to be assigned to quarantine, so had no address to send luggage ahead.
We ended up packing in three large hard-sided suitcases, two carry-on suitcases, and four large duffles. I asked an ex-pat community on Facebook what type of bags to use for a move via airplane and received amazing input! We ended up with THESE. Spoiler alert: They survived the trip.

3 – Pack Your Bags

The best two things we bought before packing were a bag scale and compression bags for our clothes.
In an effort to put a cap on the items we were packing, we divided our bags into different categories. Once a suitcase (or duffle) reached its weight capacity, we had to stop adding things or begin to trade out items.
We had a Kitchen Suitcase, a Homeschool Suitcase, a Kids’ Toy Suitcase, a Tech/Books carry-on, a Day of Traveling Carry On, and duffles of clothes.

Look Inside our Kitchen Bag:

Two good knives
Plastic cutting boards
Measuring cups and spoons
Silpat
Rolling pin
One plastic plate and bowl for each child and child-size utensils
One water bottle for each family member
Silicon smoothie straws
1 cookie sheet and 1 muffin tin
Aeropress and filters
Small travel-size dish soap
Laundry detergent for 10 loads of laundry
Two yeti mugs
Two kids’ mugs
Hot chocolate mix, Starbucks Blonde Roast ground coffee, Mason’s Marks and Spencer’s tea, Kraft macaroni and cheese, and peanut butter
Various utensils for cooking: meat thermometer, Wine/Beer opener, can opener, cooking spatula
Bose Speaker

Look Inside our Homeschool Bag:

Luke’s 1st-grade Math, Language Arts, and Handwriting curriculum was purchased before leaving the United States. You can order American curriculum from Australia, but be prepared to pay a much larger shipping cost.
Chloe’s handwriting book, letter and number flashcards
Science Curriculum
Select educational books that no one could say goodbye to for the year
The New City Catechism for Kids
Jesus Storybook Bible
2 small dry-erase boards
dry erase markers
sticky notes and pens
Watercolor paper and watercolors
Coloring supplies
Nature Journals and colored pencils

Look Inside our Kid’s Toy Bag:

Scooter for each child (Pro Tip: You can take them apart to fit in a suitcase for travel!)
Magnatiles
Legos
Books
Lovies and 2 stuffed animals per child
Sarah’s Silk and clamps for fort building
Art supplies for crafts (glue, googly eyes, yarn, etc).
Odds and ends that couldn’t be left behind and that fit among the scooters

Overall, we were happy with the decisions we made in packing. I almost felt like we took too many clothes, but it’s so hard to know exactly what a climate is like until you actually get there. And we had the added twist of a Covid lockdown, which means we left the house far less than we might have under other circumstances. The only thing we really regretted not having (and we couldn’t easily find in Sydney) was our cheese slicer. Which, isn’t that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things!

All things being equal, I would likely pack in the same way if we were to do another international move – unless the company wanted to pay for our move.

What would you pack in your bags for an international move?

Everyone wants to be part of a winning team.

I remember when the Jacksonville Jaguars nearly went to the Superbowl. I don’t even particularly enjoy football and I was swept up in the excitement, the anticipation, and the hope of the big win. The city came together, people bought shirts, put on bumper stickers, and had signs in their yards. Something about the idea of coming out on top, being the best, and winning exhilarated and united us. It feels good to be part of a winning team.

Do you lead a winning team?
Do your volunteers have a sense of collective excitement?
Do they get swept up and engaged as they work together towards the winning point?

Here are some things to think about as you create ways for your team to win together.

1 – Define the “win”.

Does everyone know what the win would actually be?

If you don’t define it, team members will come up with their own. You will find people working towards different end goals – causing an overall loss of momentum and conflicting energy.

Make sure the win is clearly stated and easy to understand. You shouldn’t need to spend an hour in training to ensure everyone understands what you are trying to do and what their role should be.

What is the ONE thing you want to see happen on your team that means everyone has been successful? It doesn’t mean that you can’t ask your volunteers to do other things too, it just means that everyone should understand that this one thing is a priority.

2 – Talk about the “win” more than you think you should.

Andy Stanley says, “Vision leaks”. And he’s right.

Repeat the “win” in as many different ways and environments as possible.

When asking someone to join your team, use this language as part of your ask. When thinking about your training, define the win. When you send emails to remind people of their schedule, re-share the story of why they are part of the team. You will feel as though you are talking about the goal too much, but you aren’t. You are most likely the only one who is constantly thinking about your team and what they are working towards accomplishing.

You are the one who can keep the vision and the “win” in front of the team.

3 – Share stories of winning.

What gets celebrated, gets replicated.

With that in mind, make sure that the things you are celebrating are the actual things you want to see happen again in your organization or team.

Share stories of how the team is winning via email, social media, newsletters, training, and in person. Handwrite a card thanking your volunteers and point out the way you saw them winning. Publically give awards or prizes to volunteers who are accomplishing the win, and make sure to highlight the story of how they “won” in that particular way.

Sharing a story helps you not simply tell someone what the “win” looks like, but to show them. It gives the vision feet and legs to stand upon and allows your team to understand what a real, life version of winning might look like and then they can emulate it.

Think about the teams you are leading.

Can everyone clearly articulate the goal?

If not, spend some time this week defining the “win”, planning how to share it in multiple communication streams, and how you will celebrate it. It’s more fun to be part of a team that’s winning – help your team understand how to win and keep celebrating it.

The Rush is Inside of Me.

There’s a saying, “Wherever you go, there you are.”

It means that you can’t outrun yourself or your problems or the places where you find yourself struggling. You can change your location, your environment, your job, or the people you surround yourself with, but the common denominator between all those things, you, will still be there.

Wherever you go, there you are.

It’s both a beautiful and a terrifying idea.

I felt a lot of pressure to do everything well in my pre-Sydney life. I served as a part-time pastor, a full-time mom to two kids, and a first-time homeschooler. Sometimes I felt so rushed, as though there wasn’t enough time for everything to get done. And the reason I felt like that was often that it was true. There literally weren’t enough hours to do all the things I wanted to do well.

I must not be the only one who experiences this, because there is an actual name for it: Hurry Sickness. (Thanks to John Mark Comer for highlighting this in, The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry.)

Psychologists define hurry sickness as a behavioral pattern characterized by continual rushing and anxiousness, or an uncomfortable feeling in which someone feels chronically short of time, and so tends to perform every task faster and to get flustered when encountering any kind of delay.

I’ve experienced this for most of my life, I just didn’t know it had a name. I find myself believing that everyone else has much more time and that I am the only one who feels so stretched.

In high school, I wondered what it might be like to be some of my friends with more margin in their lives, jealous of what I perceived to be their lack of time anxiety. I imagined them watching Dawson’s Creek, painting their nails, and relaxing. Who knows why they were painting their nails in this scenario?! That must have been the ultimate dream for me.

Even today, when I see someone out for a midday walk or run without children, I think, “Must be nice to have that kind of time!” That knee-jerk thought reveals a deep longing inside of me.

Hurry Sickness is such a part of me that I believed that quitting my job and moving to another part of the world might be the cure to end all cures. And it was kind of. I no longer move from Zoom meeting to Zoom meeting, from congregant coffee to staff member coffee. I no longer spend hours wrestling with a sermon before coming home to prepare dinner, do bedtime, throw in laundry, and plan our lessons for the next day.

However, I’ve only been in Sydney for four months, all of them under strict lockdown restrictions, and I can feel it creeping in again.

Wherever you go, there you are.

The rush is inside me. The anxiety doesn’t come from the outside pressure or the environment I’m in. The anxiety and pressure and hurry must come from within.

As we walk to our weekly play date with the one friend we have in Australia, I worry we will be late. As we came home from the playdate, I’m afraid we will miss the window for naptime. During naptime, I rush to the grocery store, anxious that I’ll take longer than the kids will rest. Then, while they were less than enthused to play by themselves, I made homemade dough for our pizza night, with a gnawing sense in the pit of my stomach that I wouldn’t finish everything that needed to be done before our Sabbath evening started. As I was kneading dough, between helping the kids with their shower and vacuuming the living room, a single thought hit me.

The rush is inside me.

I am the keeper and the carrier of this pressure I feel. I am the author and the instigator of this anxiety. In lockdown, on the other side of the world, with no one to answer to other than myself and my family, with no deadlines other than those that are self-imposed, the hurry starts with me.

I think about the words of Jesus, “Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.”

And I want that life. I want to recover my life. I want to discover real, restorative rest for my soul. I want to stay close enough to Jesus that I can say that I am walking and working with him. I want to learn the unforced rhythms of grace and learn to live freely and lightly. I want to pass this way of life on to my children.

And so, I sit in silence with Jesus today and say, slowly, with no rush, “Lord, teach me what I need to know. Teach me those things that have felt elusive in the past. Do for me what I cannot do for myself. Holy Spirit, heal the parts of me that I can’t heal on my own. I am ready for a heavenly exchange. I will offer you my anxiety, my self-imposed standards and ideals, my worry, and my hurry in exchange for your unforced rhythms of rest and your freedom.”

Do you long for that too?

Do you want to trade your hurry and your rush and your anxiety for the unforced rhythms of grace? Tell Jesus today. Close your eyes, take a deep breath, and ask Him to show you the way, His way, that leads to life.

The altar.

“Will you place your calling on the altar?”

I was pumping gas and heard the words in a split second. The image of Abraham binding Issac and placing his only son on the altar before God immediately followed. These words surprised me and were nothing that I could have made up. How in the world could He ask me to lay it on the altar? To release my grip? Since that moment, I have seen that image and heard those words gently coming back to me in moments of quiet – while driving, drifting off to sleep, washing my daughter’s hair, this persistent small, still, voice that says, “But, will you place your calling on the altar”?

I push it aside because this can’t be the actual voice of God. This can’t be what God is saying to me. I have been waiting to discover the “next thing” that God has for me. The next thing to use my giftings on, that elusive thing that will pay enough for me to get a babysitter and get out of the house. The thing that will give me a role and a place and a seat at the table…any table, besides my kitchen table.

And yet, when I hear the voice again this week, I don’t ignore it. I turn to the story of Abraham and Issac and the moment when God asks him to sacrifice his beloved son. I’ve always felt uncomfortable with this story. Why would God test Abraham in this way? And in a way that feels traumatic for his longed-for and cherished son? What would make Abraham trust God in such a way that he would go through with it?

I have more questions than answers, but I notice that perhaps Abraham didn’t really expect to give up his son. He tells Issac that God himself will supply the sacrifice. In addition, he tells his servants that he and his son will see them in a couple of days. And yet, Issac still carries the wood on his back. Abraham binds him as the sacrifice and lays him on the altar. He raises his knife. He prepares to obey God. Even if it means giving up the very thing that God gave him just a few short years ago.

Does the fact that he doesn’t actually think he will end up going through with the sacrifice make it any less about his obedience? Or make it any less of a story of God’s faithfulness? I’m not sure yet. God, Himself, does indeed provide a sacrifice. And in fact, the story prophetically foreshadows another story about another beloved, only son. This son carries the cross on his back and although he asks for the cup to be taken away, he does not turn away. He remains obedient, even to the point of death. Yet, we find out in three days time, that even death does not have the final word. What appears to be the way of death and the way of defeat is in fact the most glorious victory in history. And isn’t it just like God, just like the way of the upside-down kingdom where in the values and the economy of God, death is actually turned to life?

Even though it feels like death to set my calling on the altar of God, what if it’s actually the very path to life? All I can do, like Abraham, is trust God with the life He has given me. Each step forward is a step into the way of obedience and the way that leads to life.

What is it that you are holding tightly to today?

Are there areas of your life that you are holding onto for dear life? That you are white-knuckling? What might need to die, so that God can bring new life into your life?

May we trust in the God of Abraham.

May we trust that He knows what He’s doing.

That He has our best interests at heart.

May we open our hands in surrender and rest in His faithfulness.

Servant Leadership.

I’ve worked with multiple leaders over the years, but there are two that stand out for me as servant leaders. They were the ones leading both out front and from behind.

I specifically remember one leader routinely jumping in at the end of our weekly event to stack chairs, throw away the trash, and pack away all our lighting equipment. The other leader I’m thinking about would often quietly shrug on an orange vest and could be found greeting in the parking lot before preaching. Often new guests would be surprised to find out that he was actually the pastor! It wasn’t the only thing they did and certainly wasn’t all the time. However, when they were able, they made the intentional choice to lead by serving in what could be seen as “lesser” roles: clean up and parking. And these seemingly small, simple, choices set the culture for staff, leaders, and volunteers.

These conscious choices created a ripple effect:

1 – Increased buy-in and camaraderie from volunteers

It’s tempting to imagine that the Superbowl of Sunday morning is the preaching, while the menial jobs can be outsourced to less important people. And while it might be natural to think about ranking the roles on a Sunday morning from greater to lesser, these intentional choices to serve erased all rankings. Instead, all jobs were vital and needed to be completed.

In the same way that a household must have certain tasks done daily to run smoothly, a church has a variety of jobs that must be done. No one in the family is too important to take out the trash, do the dishes, clean up spills, and change the baby’s diapers. Imagine telling your spouse, “I’m more of an idea person…so I’ll be opting out of the lesser tasks in our home”. It probably wouldn’t go over very well. Rather, everyone pitches in when they see a need. In the same way, the leader jumped in wherever the need was greatest.

As the leaders served alongside the volunteers, it contributed to a “We’re all in this together” mentality. Rather than feeling as though they were working “for” this leader or organization, it felt as though they were working “with” them. It’s always more fun to work together towards a common goal and to feel as though your work is seen, valued, and needed.

2 – Pulled in new volunteers

For better or worse, the senior leader is the most visible person in the organization. The reality is that what this person gives their time and attention to signals importance and value. Newcomers (or regular attenders) would see the leader serving alongside others and their interest would be piqued. It would prime the pump, so to speak, for them to be asked about joining a team.

Their intentionality to serve also spoke volumes about the leader’s character and humility. Even though they drove the vision of the organization, preached multiple services, and lead the staff team, they didn’t see themselves as being above doing some of the household jobs that needed to get done. This, in turn, makes the ask to volunteer that much easier – you aren’t asking someone to do something that you won’t do yourself.

Of course, it must be said that this isn’t possible in all areas of an organization. In fact, the senior leader can not and should not have their hand in every part of the organization. This isn’t an excuse for micromanagement. They should be able to trust their leaders and staff and allow them to lead in their lanes. It’s simply a way to support, lead, and encourage those working on the front lines of an organization by coming alongside and serving as they are able.

I am reminded of an interview I heard between Andy Stanley and Frank Blake, former CEO of Home Depot. When reflecting on the turn around of Home Depot under his tenure as CEO, he credited two weekly tasks. The first was that he made time to put the iconic orange apron and walk the floor of Home Depot, interacting with customers, helping where he could, and getting a sense of the customer and employee’s experience on the ground level. The second was that he would spend time hand writing notes of appreciation to various store managers, corporate leaders, and store associates. He wanted to lead well from both the top and the bottom of the organization. He didn’t have to do either one of these things. In fact, I suspect his calendar would say he was too busy for either of them. However, looking back, he credited much of Home Depot’s success to the hour or two each week he spent on these seemingly “unimportant” tasks.

What would it look like to not only lead from the front of the organization, but from below, or the back?

Thinking about your week, where could you come alongside your volunteers or staff members to support, encourage, and serve in a new way?

Maybe it’s just 30 minutes or an hour out of your 40 hour week, but it could possibly become the most effective time you spend this week.

I see in you.

Four words that hold the power to move someone from the sidelines into the midst of what God is doing. You are looking for the God-given gold in someone, a skillset, a leadership quality, or something simply worth celebrating about a person.

I see in you this ability.
I see in you this passion.
I see in you this leadership quality.
I see in you this potential.
I see God in you when…

With these four words, you get the sacred privilege to call out a gifting in order to send them into whatever God may have for them.
It might sound something like this, “Tom, you have an amazing laugh! Every Sunday, I know it’s going to be a good day because you are so full of joy and have such an amazing sense of humor. Would you pray about joining our greeting team? Your joyful heart and laugh are so needed to help newcomers feel welcome and at ease”.

Perhaps you are acknowledging a passion and the conversation may go something like this, “Beth, when you pray for people without enough food, I see in you that God has really given you a true heart and compassion for them. Have you thought about serving at the local food bank on Mondays?”

Maybe it sounds something like, “Elaine, I see you with your grown children and your grandchildren and I am always struck by how evident it is that every single one of them loves Jesus. I see in you a gift for making faith simple and fun. And your children and grandchildren are proof! Have you ever considered sharing your gift with other families at our church?”

Or perhaps it looks like, “Wow! Sarah…I see in you a gift for connecting and gathering other people. You almost always have lunch plans on Sunday with someone new. That is an incredible gift and one that some people just don’t have. I would love to see you lead a small group this season.”

Essentially, you are acknowledging a unique, God-given quality within a person. You get the chance to affirm and build them up and celebrate this part of them. And then invite them to participate in the life of the community by using that gift. Many times, people don’t know they are gifted, don’t understand that not everyone can easily do the thing they naturally do, or don’t know that a community could be served by their particular gift.

If you don’t know where to start, ask God. He knows your congregation inside and out, better than you know them. Ask Him to give you eyes to see and ears to hear. Ask Him for the ability to supernaturally see giftings and temperaments, leadership qualities, and character traits.

Stand in the back of the worship space on a Sunday and ask God to highlight someone to encourage and to call out their giftings so that you can call them into mission. You might be surprised at who God highlights and how He can use that particular person.

This week, ask God to give you the opportunity to have one ICNU conversation with someone. Ask God for wisdom, knowledge, and insight into a person’s particular giftings and the words to call them out and into something bigger than themselves.

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Huge thanks to Dave Ferguson and Warren Bird, two leaders who first introduced me to the concept of ICNU. Check out their book here.