And He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ’s sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong. 2 Corinthians 12:9-10
I’ve always had a love-hate relationship with this particular verse. I don’t really want to acknowledge my weaknesses. Even though, they are so often the very things I can’t stop thinking about. Paul wants to boast in his infirmities, his lack, his weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest on him. I want to cover up anything that looks less than or makes me feel less than so that others don’t have the opportunity to judge me.
Really, though, are people noticing and judging me, or are they just trying to make it through their own day? Is it just me who stands before me as judge and jury? The one who finds myself wanting and lacking?
For as long as I can remember, my deepest fear is to be found to be defective, to be deficient, or to be caught being or doing wrong. When Paul starts to glorify his limitations and his weaknesses, is it any wonder that I start to get a bit queasy? And yet, the way of the cross has always been one that doesn’t make sense. It’s one that feels upside down and backward and even a bit nonsensical to us. But, we know that God’s ways are not our ways. And so, knowing this, I give Paul’s words a second glance.
What would it look like to lean into this way of living? What would it look like to not cover up our weaknesses or limits or to search for ways to push through, but instead to embrace our God-given capacities, capabilities, and yes, even our limits? What if Paul is right and Christ’s strength, the same strength that overcame death and conquered the grave really is made perfect in our weakness? What if we miss out on that strength, because we are too busy hiding, covering our tracks, and wishing away the places we perceive ourselves to be less than. What if we are robbing ourselves and those around us of the opportunity to practice seeing each other through God’s eyes?
My grace is sufficient for you.
My strength is made perfect in weakness.
Today, I will choose to listen to the words of Paul. I choose to practice saying those words over the places where I feel less than enough. And allow God’s grace (that which we don’t deserve) to come and fill the gaps in the places where I feel most weak. The places where I am learning to say, I don’t have enough strength of my own, Lord meet me here.
For when I am weak, then I am strong. Only God can take something like weakness and turn it into anything that looks like strength.
May we move towards appreciating the gifts of our weaknesses and in turn, find our strength in the enough-ness of Christ.
Katie Evans 